nye.

Day by day, bit by bit
you wear me down,
leave me looking less like myself.
And the infuriating part is that
I can’t even be mad at you because
somehow I let you.
Erosion of my soul in full swing,
I’m counting down the days until
I’ll be anywhere else.

have me.

She encourages little rebellions
and my mind wanders for days
without water.
She sinks my teeth like ships on
forgotten treasure explorations.
She is chaos meeting inertia
on a clear day, clearing
my head of thinking.

She She She

She does it all so casually,
minces my meanings.
And when she strikes that tone with me,
my bones vibrate in perfect harmony
until my ribs break free in dissonance
and drag my lungs back to her.

All my words are hers for the taking.

lemons.

Sex gone sour,
spiritually unsatisfying.
I'm sucking lemons to forget
our sweetness.

begone.

I’m staring down my well of melancholy
searching the bricks for the catalyst,
all the while knowing damn well
it’s you.
I’ve even corrupted your memory,
painted you too perfectly
and in turn you’ve infected my dreams,
poisoned them with your presence.
I thought the way out was through,
but couldn’t have been more wrong.
The only way out is to banish you.
Begone!

caged.

This city is wearing me down,
testing the limits of my sanity,
and stealing my bliss.
Facing a total erasure of my being,
I don't think I can stand it
any longer here.
I'm caged.

How did this happen?

unspun.

Mortal coils collide, tangle.
I’ve been hiding for thirty-two years,
waiting for you.
(Yeah, you.)
Do you hear me calling out?
I’m unwinding.
You’re the static in my silence,
the ringing in my ears.
We’re pure stardust baby,
and I want you next to me
when I come unspun.

consumption.

In spite of everything,
you’re collecting dust on my shelf
next to every other sorry soul
I ritualistically commodified
and consumed.
I’m sorry, my devouree.

rattled.

You cut me deep, and
I’m ashamed to have let you break me so completely.
Left me a pile of bitter bones, so much so
three years later I’m still rattling.
I confess the karmic irony.

unspeakables.

Watched the weight of my actions
pin you down and paint you into a corner.
All the unspeakables, spoken
and I have no words left
to defend myself.

infinity.

Standing in my own way,

I'm repeating old patterns
praying for the sweet release
of insanity.
Familiarity to sink my teeth into.
I find my crumbs always lead back to you.

painted on.

Painted my fingers
on to your skin, stretched tight
and stiff from application.
I said I'd never let you go
and if you're into that
that we should break the skin
to forge these promises,
etch them into bone.

unironically calls her father ‘daddy’.

We provide an insight into our broken fucking youth:
fucking each other for things to do.

My homegrown villainess waits in bed
spewing hot, ashen stares in my direction,
devious but no deceit.

Taking a dangerous cue from my humanistic impulses, i
batten down the hatches and stain her smile.

I’m no hometown hero, but something isn't right.

brutal truth.

brutal truth,
I mythologized you
and make no excuses for my
rampant romantic rhapsodies.

highly primitive.

future's listening,
what'd you say?
highly primitive
highly primitive desire

strange beast.

your dagger stares
awaken a strange beast
within

primal pursuit.

suddenly awakened by a
primal pursuit
my skin aches for your
small sparks